My problem with Wikipedia

Well, there’s multiple problems with Wikipedia, including when it gets ragingly hacked by douche bags with half of something to say, but the one I’m going to quickly discuss before I move onto my next review is this one:

Go to a Wiki page concerning any movie. Here are some examples: What’s Eating Gilbert Grape or Wild at Heart.

Okay, I hope you read through the plot parts and haven’t seen the movie. Why? Because you’ve just had the whole goddam thing spelled out for you. From beginning to end in five paragraphs or less.

And why is this a problem in this the information age? I’ll tell you why: when you’re bored with a film, you can just hop over there and read the paragraph you don’t feel like watching. And then proceed to bitch about the movie as if you’ve seen the whole thing.

I’ve always been a proponent, at least in literature, that there’s no such thing as a spoiler. In classrooms, we are discussing the end right from the beginning to give perspective to actions and motifs. But I think that for film there is a different set of rules because, with a novel, you’re going to be investing days in trudging through page after page of prose whereas with a film you’re going to be only trudging for between 90 and 240 minutes or so. And what kind of busy-ass person are you that you can’t just sit for a few hours and enjoy a film whether or not you hate it? Only the people who have to schedule in masturbation are too busy to watch a film.

So spoilers are pertinent in the world of film (and, say Agatha Christie novels) because you’re investing so little time in them that they demand all of your attention. Maybe a movie you hate has some great lines or at least one acting job you admire.

Going to the Wikipedia page is copping out.

It’s the poor man’s idea of knowing how to talk about a film. The only people who read a Wikipedia page and then talk about a movie are the ones who want to seem smarter to attract people to them. And I’ve been there–it doesn’t fucking work.

So just sit back and appreciate a little bit of art. Don’t cop out on a film. You’ve only got a little bit longer to go before it’ll be over. It’s not like Crime and Punishment where it is crime and punishment to wade through Raskolnikov’s waxing about nihilism.

However, I will postempt these statements with a good thing about Wikipedia as opposed to some internet film forums: they lay out, without argument, some of the films themes and motifs you may not have caught. Plus cover art for the DVD or whatnot as well as most other shit you can find at IMDB.

Yea, anyway.

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